


lipstick on your collar told a tale on you, boy

by thymia



Category: Minecraft (Video Game), Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Anal Sex, Attempt at Humor, Gay Sex, Healing Sex, Implied Sexual Content, Implied/Referenced Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Internalized Homophobia, Lazy Mornings, Lipstick & Lip Gloss, M/M, Morning After, Oral Sex, Pet Names, Religious Conflict, Secret Relationship, Sex, Smoking, Smut, but mentally, not a well kept secret
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-15
Updated: 2021-03-22
Packaged: 2021-03-23 23:36:01
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 7,472
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/30063294
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thymia/pseuds/thymia
Summary: schlatt + wilbur have a secret relationship but theyre not at all as subtle as they hope.heavily implied sexual content, mention of drinking and smoking. mention of negative thoughts, and self-harm but it's only one line.Chapter 2 NSFW - Actual sexual content, 18+ only. Not entirely sure if mature or explicit is appropriate, marked it explicit to be safe[title from lipstick on your collar by connie francis]
Relationships: Jschlatt/Wilbur Soot
Comments: 7
Kudos: 120





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> "We are not dirty, he keeps saying. We are not dirty..." - Driving, Not Washing, Richard Siken. or maybe "Makes a cathedral, him pressing against me, his lips at my neck, and yes, I do believe his mouth is heaven, his kisses falling over me like stars." - Saying Your Names, Richard Siken. it's cliche either way.  
> i don't have a lipstick kink, this just happened. it turned out to be a good way to tie everything together.  
> i might update this, might make a part two going into detail of what happened on their date night.  
> didnt put in other character or ship tags so people scrolling thru like sbi tags looking for fluff n stuff dont accidentally stumble upon this.

Moonlight streams in the open window, and through the glass of the door to the balcony. The pair roll apart from each other, panting and gasping for fresh air. A brief moment of calm between them, a moment Will could look upon his partner and admire him, angelic almost, splayed out and worn post-coitus.

The calm did not last. “Eugh, I feel gross and sticky..” Schlatt groaned, rubbing at his eyes before sitting up.

“Are you going to clean up, do you need any help?” Will asked kindly, rolling on his side, watching Schlatt sit up and start digging through the pockets of his pants.

“Nah, I’m heading out for a smoke, you’re welcome to join me if you want.” He said, as he found his pack he stepped into his boxers and was out to the balcony, leaving the door open as he went.

Schlatt got through one cigarette before Wilbur appeared beside him where he leaned on the railing. “Here, water.” He murmured, offering Schlatt a glass of water, which he did accept. His voice was wrecked, and the water helped marginally.

“Nice night out, huh?” Schlatt remarked quietly, taking a sip of the water as he tapped the ash off into an ashtray that sat on a small tray that hung on the railing.

“Yeah, it is. Beautiful out.” Will nodded, gazing up at the sky before turning it to Schlatt, hunched over the railing, hand dangling over the edge like he wanted to drop the glass in the streets. Not as beautiful as you, he wants to say, you look a mess but you’re more beautiful than all the stars and the moon in the sky.

“What?”

“What?”

“You’re staring at me, do I have something on my face or what?”

Will snorted, grinning as he looked Schlatt over. “Yeah, actually you do. Remember at the start of the night when I pulled out that lipstick?” That wasn’t what Wilbur was focused on though.

“Wilbur, you prick, I did, I forgot all about that.” Schlatt huffs, flushing and shaking his head at the thought.

It started like this, a warm spring evening, Wilbur refusing dinner at home because he was supposed to be going out with Schlatt.

“You knew about this, Dad! We’ve been planning this night for weeks!” Wilbur sighs, following Phil around the kitchen. Phil was in a mood because Wilbur wasn’t going to be having dinner at home, for the first time in a few years at least. 

Phil scoffed as he stirred at a pot on the stove. “I know, doesn’t mean I have to like it. He’s a good guy, but he can be so sleazy sometimes, don’t let him do anything to ya, a’right?” He confirmed shooting Will a worried look.

“I’ll be fine, Phil. We’re both adults, you’re talking like I’m some schoolgirl going out with her boyfriend for the first time!” Wilbur giggled, amused by his dad’s worry. 

“What’re we arguin’ about? Whose side am I on?” Technoblade asked, dragging himself down the stairs.

“I’m going out!” Was all Wilbur said as he brushed past Techno to get upstairs.

“He’s goin’ out?”

“He’s going out.”

Wilbur would not be going out. Saying he was going out, however, got less judgment than saying he would just be spending a few hours at Schlatt’s shitty apartment. Not by a lot since Phil still worried about Wilbur despite being friends with Schlatt, or perhaps because of how close he was with Schlatt. 

But, saying that they were going out for dinner as friends, maybe getting a few drinks, and then they’d come back, Schlatt would drop Wilbur off and take Tubbo home since they had to be at church the next day was a believable enough lie. Phil bought it at least, and the kids definitely did, and with any luck, Technoblade would buy it too.

“...So, why are you dressed up again?” Technoblade asked, looking Wilbur over with a bemused look on his face.

“I’m going out!” Will grins, checking himself one last time, peeking in his bag to make sure he had everything.

“..With Schlatt. But it isn’t a date.” Techno snorted, sticking his hands in his pockets.

“It’s not! We’re just friends, and we’re both straight.” Will laughed, slinging the satchel over his shoulder, and pretended to fuss with his suspenders as he waited for his not-date to arrive and get him out of this conversation.

“What have you got in your purse, ay? D’you got any candy?” Tommy questioned, suddenly butting into the fray, and started grabbing at Will’s bag.

“Tommy! Stop, no I don’t. And it isn’t a purse, let go!” Will batted the boy’s curious hands away from his bag. He did not want the kid finding the lipstick he slipped inside earlier, it was bad enough buying it and trying to keep it away from the rest of the household, particularly Fundy who pocketed every little thing he found in the room he still shared with his father.

“What the fuck did I just walk into?” Schlatt asked, poking his head in the door before stepping into the living room.

“Papa, are you going on a date with Uncle Wilbur?” Tubbo asked, tugging on Schlatt’s pant leg to get his attention. Everyone was way too riled up by the fact they were both going out to properly greet Schlatt.

“What! No, I’m not! It’s not a date! Christ, who told the kid it was a date?” Schlatt asked, looking between Wilbur and Technoblade.

“No one! Everyone’s just got this crazy idea that we’re going on a date!” Wilbur laughed, stepping up beside Schlatt, resisting the urge to link their arms. 

“Yeh, real crazy idea, I don’t know where we got it from. It’s not like you’ve been talking about it nonstop for weeks.” Phil chimed in from the kitchen.

“It’s not like you’re both dressed up almost better’n me.” Technoblade crossed his arms over his chest now. Wilbur wore his black jacket over a gray button-up, along with suspenders that were less for holding up his pants and more of just to look cute, and he definitely wanted to look cute he wore his glasses, that anyone who knew Wilbur knew he loved to bat his lashes behind the lenses. And Schlat straight up just wore a suit, indigo in color, complete with a red tie, a similarly red pocket square, and a small bright blue star on his lapel.

“You all know we’re not into each other. I’m a good Catholic man, I’d never date Wilbur. No offense, you’re cute, but, ya know.” Schlatt chuckled, letting their suspicions roll off his back as he crossed himself.

“We’re not dating, I promise, we’re just going out for dinner, maybe a few drinks?” Will confirmed, looking over to Schlatt who nodded.

“Let’s just see where the night takes us.” He stepped back, opening the door again.

The night took them right to Schlatt’s apartment, where they both shed their jackets and rolled up their sleeves. The night took them to the kitchen where they shared a bottle of wine that had been pulled out to be used in a steak recipe. The night took them into Schlatt’s bedroom after Wilbur said he had something to show Schlatt. Which was where the lipstick came into play, which was why Schlatt was covered in lipstick marks, why they both were.

“So,” Wilbur started, glancing over to Schlatt with a wicked grin. “You got it in ya for a little bit more?”

“Fuck off, I’ve had enough for..At least a week.” Schlatt huffed, taking another drag of his cigarette. 

“Maybe, but this’ll be the last time we’ll get to do this probably for quite a while. It’s not like we’ll have much privacy at Phil’s. They suspect something of us already.”

“Well, they’re not wrong.” 

“I know, I just don’t want to hear them rub it in. And I know you don’t either. So, come on, a little more? I haven’t shown you everything I wanted to do with that lipstick after all.” Will teased, still grinning, a grin that brightened when it was returned.

“Fine, but only ‘cause I’ve got a trick up my sleeve I’d like to try out too.” Schlatt put out his cigarette and chugged the rest of his water, letting Will tug him back inside by his horn, both of them forgetting to shut the door behind themselves.

Hours later, sunlight streams in the window, and through the still-open door, a breeze blowing through as well. Schlatt just groans and wriggles up enough to yank the window shut and pull the curtains from their knot. Wilbur whined at him for shaking the bed when he flopped back down on his front, face buried in the pillow.

“Are you done?” Schlatt whined in return when a few minutes later Wilbur started rolling about.

“Fuck off..!” Will laughed, not fully understanding Schlatt, but he could hear the petulant tone and assumed it was some sort of snark despite the tail that stuck out the back of his boxers and wagged. Wilbur got comfortable on his side, to watch Schlatt in the morning light as he dozed back to sleep. 

He was still beautiful, Wilbur realized, still a mess, but still beautiful. His hair was mussed from Wilbur’s hands, and his neck was a blotchy mess from Wilbur’s mouth, his horns were covered in red marks and rings from the lipstick they shared last night. 

Eventually, Schlatt woke up for good, and Will had to pretend like he didn’t just spend the past half hour admiring the ram as he slept. “Morning, princess. Did you get enough beauty sleep?” He asked as Schlatt sat up to lean on his arm, sleepily blinking at Wilbur.

“Mm, yeah. Don’t think you did though..” He teased with a tired grin on his face.

“Oh, says you! You should’ve stopped me last night, I don’t know how we’re gonna explain this..” Will mused, ghosting his fingers over the marks he left on Schlatt’s skin. 

“Shut up, I still look better than you.” Schlatt’s voice was still a wreck, worse than it was in the middle of the night. It felt beautiful and domestic in a way, lying together and chatting even if they were discussing hickeys and bruises.

“That’s not what you were saying last night, ‘Oh, Wilburrr that’s so hawt, do it again’.” Wilbur teased, shifting closer to press kisses to Schlatt’s horn when the ram rolled onto his back.

“Yeah, but now I’m asking you to stop. You’re gonna cut yourself again, quit.” Schlatt pushed Will’s head away when he started mouthing at the end of the horn. 

“No, I won’t, this isn’t the sharp one. I got pretty far on it last night.” Will let himself be pushed away but continued to thumb at the blunt broken tip of it even if Schlatt couldn’t feel it.

“True..” Schlatt breathed, trying not to fall back asleep, what with Will’s comfortable weight next to him, the hands moving across his skin and through his hair, the slight breeze through the open door. But he had to get up eventually, they both did. Schlatt couldn’t miss church, and Wilbur had to get back home.

“Nah, come on now, kid. We’ll be back later, but we gotta get you ready for church.” Schlatt reassured Tubbo who was begging for another hour with Tommy. 

“What happened to you?” Came Techno’s blunt voice from the kitchen doorway. Wilbur had hurried upstairs to change out of last night’s clothes so he dodged questioning for now.

“Girl at the bar got a little too mouthy if you know what I mean.” Schlatt chuckled, gesturing to his horns which were still stained red even after washing.

“You two had fun then,” Techno had trudged back upstairs and Phil approached now. “What happened to bringing Will home and taking Tubbo back? We were worried ‘bout you, mate. Neither of you messaged me or Techno. You know you can tell us anything.”

Phil sounded just this side of goading like he was trying to get Schlatt to talk. Phil was smart, and he definitely suspected something, but Schlatt was smart too, he wasn’t going to say a word. Not unless Wilbur was okay with it. So, he just grinned at Phil. “We had a few too many drinks, and my place was closer to the bar than here was. Sorry for not saying anything, we just passed out as soon as we got there.” He shrugged, trying not to feel beyond nervous in front of the older man, Phil was significantly shorter than him but could be very intimidating.

“Hm, and you promise you did nothing to him?” Phil asked silent murder in his eyes but a friendly grin on his face.

I was the one getting done actually, Schlatt wants to say, but he can’t so he doesn’t. “Nah, not a thing. I slept on the couch and he took my bed. Nothing happened, promise.” He assured, crossing himself.

“Alright, one more thing before you go. Sorry for keeping you so long, mate. I know you got religious duties. You’ll be back here after the service though, right? You gonna stay for dinner?” Phil questioned, ruffling Tubbo’s hair as the boy rushed to his father after having changed back into his clothes from yesterday as well, Wilbur quietly following behind, curiously meeting Schlatt’s eyes over Phil’s head, a sly wink though had him breathing a sigh of relief. Coast was clear for now.

“Ah, maybe, ya know? Can’t promise anything, but I’ll try. We’ll be back soon! Bye, everyone! Say, bye..!” He let Tubbo say goodbye to everyone before they took off.

He managed to get Tubbo dressed and got to church just in time. Schlatt still feels eerie entering church no matter how many times he goes, no matter how old he gets, it always feels like the Lord Himself is breathing down his neck. He confesses to relapsing and going back to his vices, to having smoked and drank last night, but makes no mention of the sin he committed between the sheets.

He was coming to terms with it slowly. He still feels guilty, and it still feels like the scars on his back threaten to open up sometimes. But he’s trying to get better, trying not to bury his guilt and pain under drink and smoke, and he’s mostly stopped thinking of hurting himself. He finds better, healthier solutions for the thoughts that plague him. The thoughts cannot take root if they’re fucked out of him. And why, after all, would God make the male form so lovely if it were a sin for him to admire. Loving men cannot be a girls-only club, it just isn’t fair.

So, maybe once service was done and he was dropping Tubbo off he tried to take Wilbur to help him pack just so he could ogle the guy. Maybe. It didn’t work anyway, since Technoblade stepped up and got all smug about being strong, and maybe he is buff and pretty, but it’s not the same. Technoblade snorts and grunts as he lifts the boxes and that’s not sexy at all.

“What’s this?” He questioned, turning a small black and gold tube over in his hands.

“What’s what?” Schlatt turned the question back around before looking up.

“This... I found it on your dresser.” Techno offered it up for Schlatt who was folding up work clothes on the other side of the room.

“Oh, that’s um- That’s a-” He stops speaking when Techno manages to pull the cap off and narrows his eyes at the stick of red pigment that he had revealed. 

A mess of emotions flicker across his round face as he looks between the lipstick and Schlatt, or more specifically the faded but still clearly the same shade of red stains on Schlatt’s horns. There’s confusion at first, then surprise, then realization, before he settled on a mix between horror and disgust. “The fuck’d you do to my brother?” Damn, he’s good.

Schlatt stumbled over his words, sputtering as he tried to find an answer. “I-We just- He-You don’t-..”

“Bruhh...Ya know what, I don’t wanna know. You can-Whatever. I don’t know a thing.” Techno huffed a laugh and repressed a shudder as he closed the cap and chucked the tube to Schlatt who quickly pocketed it. 

They didn’t pack up everything, just enough for Schlatt and Tubbo to spend the next week at Phil’s before Schlatt would have another chance to get the rest. But it was one step closer to moving in for good.

Dinner was awkward that evening, Phil was still suspicious, Techno was more awkward than usual and he kept eyeing the faded ring of red on Schlatt’s broken horn and then cringing because it sat a little too far up for him or the voices to ignore. And while they weren’t mocking Techno for once, it was almost worse to listen to his peanut gallery giggle about how his brother is most definitely ‘a sheep fucker’ as they put it. Wilbur slipped Schlatt a wink when it was discussed that Phil was beginning to build Fundy his own bedroom since he was getting old enough to sleep on his own. 

Soon the kids are in bed and the adults sit in the living room trying to make easy chatter when Schlatt stands from the coffee table, too uncomfortable to continue. “I think I’m gonna start unpacking my shit.” He announced suddenly, ignoring the look Phil and Techno shared before glancing between Schlatt and Wilbur, neither of them acknowledging it. Schlatt purposefully ignored them as he headed off to go unpack, and Wilbur was too busy staring at Schlatt to notice.

“Let me help you, dude. I can hang your crucifix for you!” Will chirped, hurrying to follow Schlatt into what used to be the guest bedroom.

“How does Will-” Phil started, glancing at Techno, nodding at the knowing look the pig sent him. “C’mon, mate. Let’s head out back, I bet it’s not too cold out.” Phil offered, pushing himself to stand, helping Techno up as well, and headed outside.

They were adults after all. Whatever they did behind closed doors was no one’s business but their own, and as long as they kept what they did behind those doors to themselves, and no one else had to know then all would be fine. 

Schlatt does end up getting to take Wilbur with to finish packing since Technoblade was gone come Monday morning even though he was supposed to stay for another week or two. If Wilbur offers one last time for old time's sake before the so-and-so who was supposed to come pick up the mattress would arrive, no one needed to know. 

...Except when they get home, and Schlatt's trying to introduce his tabby to Phil's cats, he notices Phil staring at him. Hard.

"What's up? You're staring, do I have something on my face?" He asks with a nervous laugh, he was pretty sure he washed his face before he left the apartment.

"Yeh, well, not on your face... You've um- You've got pink..On your horns, mate." Phil answered, gesturing in a spiral to the side of his head.

And...Shit. This is going to be harder to play off than either of them had previously thought.


	2. lie down on the bed, you're all i ever wanted and worth dying for, too...

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> [NSFW 18+ ONLY] CW// sexual situations   
> Don't Like, Don't Read.  
> [chapter title from wishbone by richard siken bc i found my copy of Crush recently and cannot put it down]

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> schlatt was canceled again, the world continues to turn and the show goes on. dont like him dont read this. dont like the subject matter dont read.

Them getting together started out so simple, so easy. It started as a one-time thing. It started in the middle of winter when Schlatt was overcome with anxiety and self-loathing because he quit drinking again. He dropped in at Phil’s during dinner, both he and Tubbo were easily welcomed in as always and allowed to stay the night.

**You whisper to WilburSoot: Meet me @ living room after the kids go to bed pls? Just need to talk**

He sent after dinner, while they were watching over the kids get out the rest of their energy in the backyard.

**WilburSoot whispers to you: What’s up? You good?**

**You whisper to WilburSoot: No but that’s why i wanna talk nothing bad just gotta vent to someone**

He just couldn’t be alone tonight, he’d explain later when they’re the only ones left awake in the house, that it felt like his mind was cannibalizing itself like some shameful ouroboros and Wilbur was the only one he trusted to talk about this with. 

And boy did they talk. Wilbur was almost too easy to talk to, he managed to drag everything out of Schlatt. It was easier confessing to Wilbur than it ever was confessing to the priest at church, despite the lack of separation between them and the fact he had to face the consequences of admitting that he wasn’t exactly as straight as he always portrayed himself to be and actually had quite the crush on his best friend.

Said consequences turned out to be trying to figure out whether or not he should take the sudden offer Will comes up with.

“I can help get rid of the thoughts if you’d like. At least for a little while.” Will offered lightly, and Schlatt couldn’t help but notice the way he shifted on the couch. It looked almost deliberate, the slight way he spread his legs and slipped a hand down his thigh to rest on his knee.

“Yeah? What did you have in mind?” Schlatt asked, just this side of nervous. They had joked and danced around homosexuality for quite a while now, and for Wilbur to pull this cryptic shit right after Schlatt has admitted to sort of meaning every semi-sexual joke while also being horribly guilt-ridden because of it.. Well, it just sets him on edge.

“Sex.” And what the fuck is that supposed to mean? He said it so simply too like it was fucking obvious.

“..What?” Schlatt asked, blinking quickly as he practically took a double-take at the man who sat next to him on the low couch. Because it wasn’t fucking obvious.

“Sex. Sexual healing. It’s a thing. In this case, if I fuck you hard enough then you won’t be able to think all those nasty things about yourself.” Wilbur still spoke as if it were the most obvious thing in the world.

“You-...You want to fuck my brains out?” 

“Sure. Why not. We don’t have to if you don’t want to, of course, but I think it could help.”

“...Okay. Yeah, why not.”

“C’mon, let’s break in that new bed of yours.” Will grinned, taking Schlatt by the hand, and leading him down the hall.

“So,” Will hums a few hours later after they’ve had a good long go at it, gazing down at the tired ram who lay flat on his back, an arm draped over his eyes as he tried to catch his breath. “You feel better?”

“Fuck, Will… That was..” Schlatt huffed, pulling his arm away to grin up at Wilbur, who sat up against the headboard.

“Good?” Will asked with a chuckled, reaching down to stroke one of Schlatt’s fuzzy little ears.

“You’re the only thing on my mind right now, so yeah…”

It started as a way to clear Schlatt’s head, a coping mechanism. Probably not the healthiest, but healthier than anything else Schlatt’s tried. But it quickly turned into more. Into Wilbur sneaking downstairs after Fundy falls asleep, both of them taking their lunch break to find somewhere discreet to meet up, and eventually turned into them spending weeks planning out a date night. So they could have a proper night all to themselves, not a quickie in the middle of the day, not Wilbur sneaking downstairs and sneaking back up as soon as he could because he was worried Fundy might wake up.

No, a proper date, where they got dressed up and had dinner together. Schlatt couldn’t afford a nice restaurant and he wouldn’t make Wilbur pay, luckily Will was charmed enough by a homecooked meal. And while they probably shouldn’t have, they shared a bottle of wine after a bit was poured out for the recipe.

“C’mon, I have something to show you.” He snickered, digging in his bag, pulling something out before quickly slipping it into his pocket before Schlatt could get a look at it. The lipstick Wilbur previously bought, after Schlatt had made multiple mentions of the lipgloss he had worn during one of their lunch hour quickies. He seemed to really be into it, so why not indulge in a harmless kink or two.

“Okay. What is it?”

“Not here, come to the bedroom.”

“Ughh, I gotta get up and come? I just sat down, Wilbur!”

“Come, Schlatt. I promise it will be worth it.” Will beckoned again, from where he stood in the front of the hall, flitting away and into Schlatt’s bedroom when the other man stood from the couch.

Schlatt chugged the rest of the wine and slowly stalked after Wilbur. His slow pace gave Wilbur enough time to shrug off his suspenders, unbutton his shirt slightly, and put on the lipstick, using the gold handheld mirror that sat in the nightstand drawer, pulling out the small green tin of wool grease that he found as well. If this went well, then they’d definitely need it.

“So, what’s- ..Is that-Oh, Wilbur,” Schlatt murmured, stepping into the room, his gaze slowly, appreciatively, sweeping over Wilbur laid out on his bed, exposed chest flushed from arousal and alcohol, his legs spread invitingly, and his plush lips painted a bright red Schlatt almost couldn’t pull his eyes from. “You’re so fuckin’ hot, Wilbur, Jesus Christ…” 

Wilbur grinned, the red splitting to reveal his pearly whites. “Then come here and do something about it, big guy.” 

“How about you make me come.” Schlatt approached the bed but didn’t do much more than set his hands on it. He liked playing tough and hard to get but would relinquish control to Wilbur as soon as Wilbur got demanding in the slightest.

“Come here, princess.” Will cooed, grin widening when Schlatt’s hand moved to rub his thigh.

“You call me big guy then you call me princess...You’re sending mixed signals, Will, maybe I should just go..” Schlatt teased, glancing over his shoulder, until Will’s hands were on his tie, tugging him forward without tightening it.

“Jonathan Schlatt, get on this bed and kiss me. I didn’t buy this lipstick, spend a week and a half hiding it from my son, just for you to get cold feet.” Will growled lowly, one hand slipping up Schlatt’s tie to his face, to cup the man’s round cheek, fingers brushing through the woolly hair there.

Schlatt scrambles onto the bed, and into Wilbur’s lap, eagerly kissing Will as soon as he was close enough. They pull apart a little too soon for either of their likings but they had to breathe and Schlatt started grumbling about Will’s glasses getting in the way as he pulled them from Will’s face and set them on the nightstand. 

“Ah, fuck,” Will giggled, getting a good look at Schlatt’s face, and the smear of red on and around his mouth. “Guess this isn’t kiss-proof..” He mused, frowning at the tube of lipstick.

Schlatt glanced at himself in the mirror Wilbur had set on one of the pillows. “I’m not mad, it’s kinda hot, actually.” He admitted with a shrug.

“Yeah? ..Yeah, I guess so. I can see it..” Will’s grin came back as he looked Schlatt over and pictured him covered in kiss marks. 

Soon the mirror was shoved back into the drawer after they just decided to take turns applying the lipstick to each other. Soon, the red marks started to trail down Schlatt’s neck, even smudging onto the collar of Schlatt’s shirt as Will kissed down his body. “You’re so hot, Schlatt...Fuck, I love seeing my marks on you. Knowing you’re mine and no one else’s... _ My _ boy..” He sighed before pressing another kiss to Schlatt as he worked on untying his tie and unbuttoning his button-up.

“All yours, Will. No one else can get me like this, only you..” He trailed off into a breathy little whine just from a little kissing, not even heavy petting.

But more was imminent, from the way Schlatt kept whining and Wilbur kept rocking his hips down into Schlatt’s. “I bet I could make you cum, just from this..” Wilbur whispered into the fuzz of Schlatt’s ear.

“Nah-uh...You’re not gonna make me cum, Wilbur. Not like this..” Schlatt chuckled breathily, grinning as Wilbur moved to kiss him again.

That’s how things went for a good while, Will going between kissing and sucking at Schlatt’s neck and chest and then back to his mouth as they finished undressing. But it wasn’t enough, and eventually, Schlatt ended up flat on his back, holding his legs up so Wilbur could prep him

“God, I hate that stuff…” He grumbled, watching Will lather his fingers with the yellowish substance from the tin. Lanolin oil that Phil had given Schlatt for his work chapped hands but has definitely seen more than just his hands.

“I do too, trust me, but it’s what we’ve got, now,” Will hummed, moving in to slip his fingers into the ram. “There we go, that’s it..All good? This is what you want, right?”

Schlatt huffed and tipped his head back to hit the pillow. Will was always so caring, always took his time with Schlatt, always made sure Schlatt gave verbal consent even now, buzzed as they were. “Yeah..Ah, fuck..! Yes, it’s good, Will.. I want your fingers, your cock too if you’ll let me. Please…” 

“Of course, princess. So, so good for me. You’ll get it in time, alright?” Will cooed, leaning down to kiss Schlatt as he worked him open. 

Maybe Wilbur did go a little too slow when it came to prepping, he did drag it out a little longer than he needed to, just to watch Schlatt squirm and whine, to relish the slight power of being able to bring him so close to the edge with just his fingers. But, that said, Schlatt still enjoyed it, very much so. He’d enjoy this night fully, even if he’d be saddled with shame tomorrow, that didn’t matter now. None of that mattered right now, nothing did.

Schlatt was certain this was Heaven, this very bedroom where he can be as loud as he wants, a kind, beautiful man kissing him, and filling him up, and saying all these dirty things in his ear made sweet by his accent. Wilbur also whispered praise that had Schlatt unabashedly bleating, praise that he felt very undeserving of. He was sure Wilbur was the one to be worshipped, all soft and pale, and near ethereal in the moonlight.

“You’re so beautiful, Schlatt,” Wilbur sighs, shifting the grip he had on Schlatt’s leg slightly. Great minds think alike. “So beautiful, and good for me..Taking me so well, can I go faster, please?”

“Please!” Schlatt agreed with a gasp as Wilbur shifted his hold on Schlatt again so he could fuck Schlatt a little faster and a little harder.

“You gonna cum?” Will asked with a breathy laugh, grinning down at Schlatt whose eyes were rolling and the hand that wasn’t wrapped around himself was awkwardly grasping around, holding onto the sheets for a moment before grabbing at Wilbur’s arm.

“Yes! Please, Wilbur, please!” He begged, finally figuring out what he wanted as he pulled Will’s hand to replace his own.

“Cum. Cum for me, princess,” Will guided Schlatt through it, unintentionally slowing as he watched the pleasure wash over Schlatt, the way his eyes scrunched shut and his mouth fell open as he babbled Wilbur’s name between ‘please’ and ‘fuck’. “God, you’re so fucking beautiful…” He sighed, almost stilling entirely.

Something Schlatt didn’t have the patience for, he might have finished but that didn’t mean he wanted Will to stop. “Please, don’t-Ah! Keep going, please!”

Will chuckled again, starting again, quickly ramping his pace up. “Sorry, got caught up-Just a little more, I promise. Almost-!” He cut himself off with a low groan as he stuttered to a stop again and pressed in deep to finish inside of Schlatt.

He rolls off of Schlatt, and onto his back. He glances over to Schlatt, he’s lit up pale in the moonlight too, and Will’s about to compliment him before Schlatt’s grumbling about feeling gross, and Will proposes help with clean up that Schlatt refuses in favor of an after-sex cigarette, something Wilbur’s been trying to cure with the sex but old habits die hard he supposes. He’s no saint either, he’s smoked from time to time and has enjoyed a smoke after sex too, the couple times Schlatt has offered. 

For now, though, Wilbur pushes himself out of bed, pulling his underwear back on as well. The rest of the house was dark and quiet, but he didn’t dare turn on any lights and disrupt the mood. He got himself a glass of water and carried another to the balcony to give to Schlatt. 

During all the commotion that was being fucked senseless Schlatt had completely forgotten about the lipstick from earlier. After brief chatter on the balcony, they head back inside and sit back on the bed.

“So, what’d you have in mind, dude?” Will questions, watching Schlatt fidget with the tube of lipstick, pulling the lid off before clicking it on again.

“Nah, you first. You brought it up.” Schlatt shrugged easily, starting to twist the cap back and forth.

“I want to suck on your horns, want to mark those up too..” 

“Sounds fun. I wanna suck your cock.” 

“What?” 

“Yeah, with the lipstick, I think it’d be hot.”

“..Alright, can’t argue that. Do you want to go first?”

“Nah, you can. C’mere.” Schlatt beckoned Wilbur close so he could apply the lipstick to his lips, and let Will grab his horns and angle his head how he wanted it. It was nice, being manhandled like this, Wilbur’s hands brushing his ears as he felt up Schlatt’s horns.

He started by kissing the right horn, stroking it, even rubbing around the base of the horn. Trying with that one was a mistake, he quickly realized as the sharp tip pricked his tongue and scraped the roof of his mouth as he tried taking it further. Schlatt though seemed to like it when he gagged on the horn and the blood quickly dripping down his throat.

“Fuck, Wilbur, that was so hot! Why’d you stop?” Schlatt whined, voice soured by his petulant tone.

“‘Cause, dude, it cut me,” Will mumbles, sticking his thumb in his mouth, frowning at the blood before wiping it away on Schlatt’s sheets they were gross enough already what was a little more. “It was hot though? Could you feel it?”

“Nah, still hot though. Do it again? You can try the other side.” Schlatt offered carefully, tilting his head slightly.

“Yeah, I’ll give it a shot. But then we have to do your idea.” Will chuckled, shifting in Schlatt’s lap, and moved his head around to where he wanted it again. The broken horn, end dulled out over the years, was easier to take, still just this side of uncomfortable but Schlatt liked it. One of his hands dug into Will’s hair, the other found its way into his boxers, unable to help himself. 

Schlatt soon got antsy and bored of this and they were fumbling around trying to find a good position. “Ah! Hey, teeth! Teeth!” Will whined when Schlatt finally got comfortable and started trying to suck him off, but he was using way too much teeth even if all his teeth were flat. And then he went too deep, and Wilbur pulled him off by the horns when he saw fear flash on Schlatt’s open eyes. But, with the hiccups out of the way Schlatt found a rhythm that worked, it was sloppy and more handjob than blowjob. But it was his first time and was bound to be a little awkward. It worked though, even if it was sloppy and awkward, and he ended up coughing and spluttering as he tried not to inhale cum the wrong way. He got Wilbur off, and Wilbur got him off, leaving a mess in his boxers that he promptly fell asleep in.

A mess he’d complain and groan about in the morning until they stumbled into the shower and managed to get most of the lipstick off. It would not come off of Schlatt’s horns though, no matter how much Will scrubbed at the marks, the keratin was stained. At least temporarily. Wilbur promised it wouldn’t be too noticeable, so he’d have to trust Wilbur.


	3. but dad, i'm finally thinkin' i may have found the one (type of (boy) that'll make you way proud of your son)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> [chapter title from cupid's chokehold / breakfast in america by gym class heroes, edited for clarity or smth]

As soon as they got home in the morning Will’s family instantly clocked that something was up. Both Phil and Techno started questioning Schlatt on his night out as soon as he got there.

Techno easily puts two and two together and heads back to Hypixel in the middle of the night. Which was unfortunate timing because he was sneaking down the stairs at the same time Schlatt was creeping to the kitchen for a drink. Techno just grumbled a ‘Bruhhh’ at the sight of Schlatt only in his boxers and covered in marks, and continued out the door. Hopefully, he wouldn’t have to see Techno for a couple of months at least and could put the awkwardness off for as long as possible. 

Then it was his coworkers, who finally caught on to what he was doing with his lunch breaks when they noticed the marks on his horns and one bastard with wandering eyes spotted a bruise on Schlatt’s groin when they were in the bathroom together. They kept asking about his girlfriend, and it took all of Schlatt’s might not to correct them because he knew if they knew that he was with another man that the teasing would just get 10x worse, and while it was fun with Wilbur he couldn’t handle his coworkers mocking him for it.

And then Phil noticed and that was the last person Schlatt wanted to know. Phil was so protective over Wilbur and seemed dead certain that Schlatt was taking advantage of Wilbur.

“It’s um-...No, that’s from...No! Hey, stop! Be nice!” He mumbled in response to Phil mentioning the bright pink on his horns but quickly got distracted by his cat slapping Phil’s cat Baby.

“Schlatt. What have you been doing with Wilbur?” Phil said lightly, slipping his hands into his pockets as he stood over Schlatt who knelt beside the living room table trying to get the cats to befriend each other.

“Listen-”

“I’m not mad, I’m just curious. There’s clearly something going on between you two.”

“Here’s the thing-”

The explanation was cut off by the back door slamming open and the kids all scurrying in together, with Wilbur trailing behind.

“You make any progress with them?” Will asks with a smile, not catching on to the awkward atmosphere in the living room yet.

“Nah, not really, Soup keeps being a dick.” Schlatt answers, distracting his cat with a bit of string.

“Kids! Could you head back outside for a bit? You guys can play swords but don’t forget your shields, I don’t want anyone getting hurt,” Phil chirped, giving Tommy a brief hug before the boy was bounding off again, excited at the idea of getting to play swords unsupervised. “I want to talk to both of you but I must make tea first, don’t let your cat kill mine Schlatt, please.” Phil said, heading to the kitchen without sparing either of them a second glance.

Schlatt scooped the tabby up and set him by his feet as he and Wilbur sat together on the couch. Soup sat down and started washing but Schlatt was pretty sure he was still glaring at Baby who sat under the coffee table glaring back.

“So, what have you two been up to lately?” Phil questioned innocently when he got back and gave the other two their tea.

Schlatt and Will shared a look as they tried to figure out how to answer that. They really were so obvious it hurt. Will decides to shrug while Schlatt sips his tea. “Oh, you know. Schlatt’s been busy moving out, I’ve been helping. Nothing new, surely.” 

“Now, boys, I’m not stupid. Do not treat me as if I am stupid. I know there is something going on between the two of you. What have you been doing together?” Phil’s gaze burns through them both, but he focuses on Schlatt.

This was..Awful, to put it lightly. How does he go about telling Phil that he regularly takes it up the ass courtesy of Wilbur? It feels like getting caught, like having to have the talk with a girlfriend’s parents as a teen, but they’re not even together. Are they? “Listen, I’m not..Doing anything to Wilbur, I promise. He’s just- He’s helping me through things...With sex…” Schlatt explains, grimacing as he spoke.

“That’s what I expected. But you guys um-Who is...” Phil grimaced too, gesturing between them. He couldn’t ask who fucked who here, having this conversation was bad enough in the first place.

“Will wears the pants in this relationship,” Schlatt chuckled before realizing the insinuation. “Not that this is a relationship! This isn’t- Right?”

“No, no! We’re just friends!” Will laughed as well, setting his teacup down to hold Schlatt’s hand when he spotted it palm up on the couch, grabbing for Will.

“..Just friends, are ya?  _ Just  _ friends do this often, do they?” Phil asked with a laugh of his own. He wasn’t stupid, he saw through their facade, saw through every dirty joke. He saw the little touches, Wilbur taking Schlatt’s hand without a second thought, he saw the way they looked at each other, saw the depth of a conversation just in a silent look shared. He saw what they couldn’t, or what they deliberately ignored. And it was nice, reassuring to see how much they cared for each other. Phil hadn’t seen either of them like this in a long time, too long.

“Well-”

“Probably not, right?”

“No, probably not. But I mean-”

And the excuse of ‘friends helping friends’ kind of goes out the window when you think about it and how the situation has grown past Wilbur just helping Schlatt out, clearing his mind in the safest and easiest way they’ve found. A certain degree of romanticism has seeped into their encounters over the past months they’ve been happening.

“Well, as long as you two aren’t hurting each other in any way. You aren’t right?” Phil asked, leveling both of them with a stern fatherly look.

“Oh, no! Of course not. I take care of him very well, he’s my boy, my best friend!” And I love him, goes unsaid as Will glances to Schlatt with a smile that is easily returned. And he loves me too, also goes unsaid.

“Alright then. That’s all I was worried about really. Glad you two are happy, I’m gonna go check on the kids outside.” Phil stood, taking his cup with and brushed a caring hand over Schlatt’s shoulder as he left.

Once Phil was outside Schlatt huffed and slumped forward, head in his hands. “Oh God, that was way less stressful than I thought it would be.. I thought Phil was going to be so mad.” He groaned but couldn’t help but smile when Will started stroking his back.

“He means no harm. He just cares a lot, doesn’t really trust you, can’t imagine why.” Will giggled, moving his hand up to brush through Schlatt’s hair.

“I’m not a good person, Will, you know that.” Schlatt whined all full of self-loathing and disgust.

“Don’t say that, you are good. We all have flaws, it doesn’t make you inherently bad. You’re good despite your flaws. You’re good, and I love you so much. I’d love you even if you weren’t good.” Will murmured, gently pulling Schlatt to sit upright so he could bump their foreheads and press a soft kiss to Schlatt’s lips.

Soup has settled, has fallen asleep under the table with Baby and Boo-Boo Kitty, the three of them form a heart together, and it feels appropriate. This wasn’t outright admitting that he loved another man, that he loved Wilbur, but it was close, a step towards doing that. And it wasn’t as scary as Schlatt thought it would be.

Playing it off didn’t work, but Phil didn’t hate him, which was good enough. Things might be a little awkward but that was life. He could deal with the awkwardness. They’d move past it eventually, and at least there was an eventually to be had.


End file.
